Thursday, November 3, 2011

Review: Touch the Dark

Title:  Touch the Dark

Author: Karen Chance

Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

Part of a Series?: First in series

Goodreads Summary:
Like any sensible girl, Cassie tries to avoid vampires. But when the bloodsucking Mafioso she escaped three years ago finds Cassie again with revenge in mind, she's forced to turn to the vampire Senate for protection.The undead senators won't help her for nothing, and Cassie finds herself working with one of their most powerful members, a dangerously seductive master vampire- and the price he demands may be more than Cassie is willing to pay.
I think there is a great story in this book...somewhere. Hidden. Deep. Really deep. Written in Pig Latin. Backwards. And upside down. Because at times, I thought I could glimpse the brilliant glow of something that could've been really, really addictive. But mostly, I was just lost and frustrated the entire time. 

Touch the Dark doesn't do much justice for paranormal fantasy, vampires, or clairvoyants (although all three groups have gotten their fair share of literary attention, IMO). It's page after page of clichés. Cassandra is the female, lone spirit clairvoyant who can occasionally skip back in time through her visions. Throughout the story, you also get to know of her tragic, dead-parent past and all of her sexy man-vampires in her life. 

For one, this book is the definition of an infodump. I've never ever read anything in my entire life that infodumps like this. And part of my frustration about being lead to believe that there is that glow of literary brilliance somewhere within the pages of the book stems from the jarring infodump pages that cut off any interesting scene. [ For example, let's place Cassandra and co. in a battle against a series of black war mages. Our protagonist is in a life-threatening situation, surrounded by enemies and on the hit list of every bad guy union in Las Vegas. Cassie's group's only shield is about to fail them when--Hey, did you know how war mages draw their shields? They simply have to imagine the shield out of anything they find protective. For the enemy mage, he imagines a wall of trees protecting himself (LOL). Pitkin's wall is water based. Cassie's is fire. Also, did you know that were-animals can apparently speak like humans even though they are transformed. Or maybe that ability is only available to half-were, half-satyr. Satyrs are half-goat men who have a ridiculous sex drive and equally ridiculous ego. But hey, that's all useless information that you really couldn't care about. Now...where were we in the actual story? Something about a shield...

Also, I just got tired of the general lack of interest I had for the characters. Cassie is such a standard mess. I don't even care about her, really. In all honesty, she doesn't have any exceptional personality trait that shouts "PAY ATTENTION" to me. She's rebellious, but what kind of PNR protagonist isn't these days? She's non-human, but well...okay, that's great. She has a flock of hot men at her beck and call. Do you get what I'm saying? And as for said hot men, they're alright. I think Chance needs to cool it with the long hair though. I find men with hair longer than their shoulders to be disgusting. I'm sorry, but this isn't the 70s. Men's hair should not be longer than mine. Specifically, Mircea and Tomas. They need haircuts. Also, they need personality upgrades to match with Cassie's. Everyone is so blah. Even the man candy stereotypes didn't really interest me. They were so predictable: aloof vampires with a soft spot for the local psychic. [And on a personal note, I think Tomas' betrayal at the end of the book was a total jump-the-shark moment for Chance. It was not something I thought Tomas' character would ever do realistically.


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